The Morton Thompson Christmas Turkey

Makes 20 servings

sue

ingredients

1 large turkey (25 lb is recommended)
Set aside giblets (neck, heart, gizzard and liver).

Dressing:

Bowl No 1
1 apple, peeled, core, diced. Granny Smith recommended.
1 orange, peeled and diced
1/2 lemon, peeled and sectioned
26 oz can water chestnuts, drained
3 tbsp fresh ginger, chopped
26 oz can crushed pineapple
Bowl No. 2
4 tbsp parsley
5 cloves garlic
4 large onions
6 stalks celery
4 cloves
2 tsp dry mustard
2 tsp caraway seeds
2 tsp poppy seed
3 tsp celery seeds
2.5 tsp oregano
1 crushed bay leaf
1 tsp black pepper
.5 tsp mace
.5 tsp turmeric
.5 tsp marjoram
.5 tsp savory
1 tbsp poultry seasoning
salt to taste
Bowl No. 3
Three 11 oz packages breadcrumbs
3/4 lb ground veal
1/4 lb ground fresh pork
1/4 lb butter

Basting Fluid:

1 bay leaf
1 tsp paprika
.5 tsp coriander
1 clove garlic
4 cups water
1 cup apple cider
salt to taste

Paste Cover:

8 eggs
2 tbsp dry mustard
4 tbsp onion juice
2 tsp salt
.5 tsp cayenne pepper
2 tbsp lemon juice
sifted flour

directions

1
Mix all ingredients for Bowl No. 1 carefully.
2
Chop the parsley, garlic, onions and celery in Bowl No. 2 and mince the cloves after removing the heads. Again, mix all ingredients thoroughly.
3
Mix everything in Bowl No. 3 Render as much fat as possible from the turkey in a small skillet and add this to Bowl 3.
4
Combine all three bowls in one gigantic bowl. According to Thompson, you need to “Mix it until your forearms and wrists ache. Then mix it some more. Now toss it enough so it isn’t a doughy mass”
5
Meanwhile chop the neck, heart, gizzard and liver, and simmer on the stove with the bay leaf, paprika, coriander, garlic and water. Do not add the cider at this point. The longer you simmer this basting fluid, the better. Keep adding more water.
6
Rub the bird inside and out with salt and pepper, and stuff it reasonably full at both ends. Tie the legs and wings tightly to the body with strong cord. Get your oven red hot (approx. 500°) and put the bird in, either on a rack or breast down on a drip pan. (this also may be a good time to open windows and/or temporary disable your smoke detector.) Mix the ingredients for the paste and sift in enough flour to make it stiff. As soon as the turkey is browned all over, haul it out, sizzling, and using a pastry brush, slap the orange paste all over it.
7
Return it to the oven for five mins to set the paste. Then haul it out once more and re-apply paste. Keep doing this until all the paste is gone.
8
Turn the oven down to 325° and put some water in the drip pan and roast. Never cook it more than nine or ten minutes to the pound.
9
Add the cider to the giblet gravy simmering on the stove, and take it off the heat but keep warm. Use this fluid to baste the turkey thoroughly every 15 minutes for the entire cooking process. Don’t forget to keep adding water in the pan to prevent it from burning.
10
The turkey will be done in about four hours, or when a meat thermometer reads 180° in the thigh and 170° in the breast. It will be, in Berton’s words “dead black”. Let it stand at room temperature for 30 minutes, then remove the blackened coating.
11
Lead your dinner guests in a moment of silence for Berton, then prepare to take compliments.